the rumors are true....

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**GULP**

Yep, people

we are pregnant again.

I know, I know, I KNOW! Please do not harass me over this, because I am barely coming to terms with this sudden change of events myself. No, this baby wasn't planned, no, we weren't just being stupid and carelss (I'm still not quite sure how this happened..), YES, we will now have what is known as irish twins, and yes, I am scared out of my mind how hard this is going to be!

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It is insane.

That is the only way I can describe it. This time last year I was barely pregnant with Minie, paralyzed with the fear that I was going to lose her like I had lost two others before. I would have been thrilled to know that in a year I would have 1+ children on the way. It's so funny how things work themselves out.

Losing my first baby was the hardest thing I ever went through. I have never felt such pain, sorrow, and lonliness. My baby died inside of me because my body didn't provide adequately enough for him, and when I left that hospital after he had been scraped from me, I have never felt so empty. I was 4 months pregnant, and my world was shattered. I have always wanted to be a mother. In my eyes there is no greater job a woman can do. I begged and pleaded with the Lord to give me the chance to be a mommy. After I lost my second pregnancy, I honestly believed I might not ever be one. It was such a trial of my faith, and when we finally got to bring Minie home from the hospital, I have never been so grateful.. I couldn't stop the tears of gratitude and happiness. We truly are SO blessed.

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I tell you all this because, this whole "oops, we're pregnant" bit, honestly is a blessing. In a way I feel like the Lord is giving me back those two sweet angels that I lost. I miscarried those two very close together, and now I get to have two to keep very close together. This whole thing is frightening! How am I going to manage? I have no idea, but one thing is clear to me
(even if it's taken some time), Heavenly Father is blessing us so richly and I cannot, and WILL not take that for granted. Minie is so incredible, and if this new little peanut is half as amazing as she is, well then we are the luckiest people in the world!

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So here are the stats:

Baby # 2 is due June 24, 2008 (yes.. a week BEFORE minie was born)

This little baby had a very healthy HB of 153 bpm

I've been sick as a dog, and no where close to threatening a miscarriage!

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Here we go baby number 2!

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*** The picture above isn't actually of our baby. We don't have a scanner and they only gave us a print out picture of him/her. However, don't worry because that is actually an embryo at 8 weeks, and looks almost exactly like ours.. there is not much differance at this stage...