Normal

That's what I crave.

This past week has been insane... surreal.

Who gets so sick that they end up in ICU... for five days?!? My husband... Man... he is in some trouble with me. I have never been so worried, or ever felt so lonely. Just the mere thought, and slightest taste of actually having to live my life without him has been wretched. I love this man so much.. he is so much. Our family doesn't function without him, and I thank every last one of you for your thoughts and prayers these past few days.

I know that's why he is getting better.

Thank you,

thank you,

THANK YOU.

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Dustin was finally released from the hospital this afternoon.

He spent Sunday-Thursday up at LDS in their Intesive Care. Monday was the roughest day as it was probably his sickest. First thing Monday morning the pulmonologist did a bronchoscopy to try and detect exactly what was happening in Dustin's lungs. He was on heavy o2, and wasn't too coherent for the better part of the day due to the heavy sedative they gave him combined with the energy he was exerting to breath. His chest x-ray still looked terrible, and after 24 hours of waiting for the culture from his lungs to grow something, nothing ever did. Over the course of 5 days he was pumped with three different types of antibiotics, and was given alburteral breathing treatments every 4 hours on top of all the oxygen he was recieving. No answers were really ever answered, but slowly Dustin started to improve. His doctor believed that because Dustin had already been diagnosed and treated with antibitocs a week before his ICU stay, they were already doing there job of killing any bacteria or virus that might had shown up on a culture. When he did the scope, instead of seeing a lot of fluid, he saw terrible inflamation which was causing the upper lobes of his lungs to collapse. Although we haven't gotten a specific daignosis, after doing some reading and internet surfing I strongly believe he had this. I think Dr. Gregory House would agree :)... But for real, I really do think this is what he may have had.

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This whole experience has just been so wild. Not that a crisis ever is normal, but this literally came out of left field. I am frightened to think of what could have been...last Friday when this all started getting hairy, his doctor was just going to send him home with some phenegren and codeine and have him "sleep off" his illness. Thank goodness he decided to dig just a tad deeper. If Dustin would have just gone home ans drugged himself up, he probably would have conked out and stopped breathing in his drug induced slumber.

*shiver*

All I know is that I got just enough dose of reality to count myself EXTREMLY blessed. All I want is my normal back. I want a husband around, I want to go bed with him beside me, I want to know he'll be walking through the door at 5:30.. to know that he will come home. I am so grateful he is home again.

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Everyone has been so supportive and kind during this whole ordeal. My Mom and sisters took the girls when necessary, and my Mom, being the saint she is made it possible for me to spend every day at the hospital with Dust. She does my job better than me, and Mins is still asking for her Nannie.

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I'm just so glad and so grateful this is behind us...

I hope to never see the inside of an ICU again.